When all the college friends have cradled the baby, some women are still confused looking for a partner who doesn’t come. Finally forced to marry a man who is not loved. Moreover, this is a mistake that could threaten marriage.
Ir Bambang Syumanjaya NN, MBA business consultant and family revealed five wrong marriage reasons. According to Bambang, many Indonesian women still see some traditional rules as reasons for marriage.
“These five reasons are the foundation of a very fragile household. I have many clients who want to get divorced for five reasons that started them wanting to get married, ”Bambang said in the Family Discovery Talkshow, Family as the Beginning of the Learning Process held by Orange Blossom Women Community at Happy Kitchen, La Piazza, Thursday (25/2 / 2010). The five reasons are:
You must be careful if you make age as an excuse to get married. You can regret later if you are married just because it is affected and the insistence of the people around you who bring up the problem of your age. Or are you frightened at the spinster’s stamp? Getting married with consideration of age is not the right reason. Most women get married in a hurry for fear of not being able to find a partner who wants to marry him later. Though mentally he is not ready. Finally, regret is obtained. “Not infrequently, at the end of marriage, only a lifetime, or always a fight,” said Bambang.
“Ah, sorry he sacrificed a lot for me.” The reason for feeling sorry for men often makes a woman feel weak and does not think long when stepping into a more serious relationship. Though this feeling of pity usually disappears when you start facing reality in the household.
“It’s even harder if it turns out that the person we are sorry for turns out to be annoying. In the end, you regret and want to divorce, “he added.
Are you among those who see your partner only from the physical appearance or financially? Good looks or beauty of people will change over time. There is nothing eternal in this world. So be careful if your physical appearance is the reason for you to get married quickly.
“There is a case of a woman getting married because her husband is rich and handsome. After getting married, it turns out my husband is sick, and wealth is running low, can you imagine what happened instead, “said Bambang.
4. Maintain family honor
In Indonesia, which still maintains eastern customs, marrying for reasons of debt or reciprocation often occurs. “Want to respect the requests of parents and want to reciprocate parents, so I just want to be married. If you like this, you have to be more careful, “he said.
5. Want to get out of the house quickly
Want to get out of the house quickly, can’t stand hearing parents always fighting, uncomfortable parents constantly arranged? If this is the reason you want to get married, rest assured you will be depressed in the face of marriage.
“Especially if the age at marriage is still very young, you can be very depressed. “The marriage enters a large responsibility and is not separated from it,” Bambang said.